Not quite sure how to describe how I feel just now other than my head hurts but not like a headache… this has the horrid chest feeling with it & a ball in the pit of my stomach. Realising I want to scream something but have no voice or words to do it. It’s a bit mental. Literally.
I feel I’ve reached a point where I’ve become stuck. Like I’m scared to step over onto the next stone, or I’m standing on a bridge unable to come off the other end. What do I want and how do I get it? How do u even know? I can’t change the past.

My thoughts of how it has put me where I am have to stop. Fuck. That’s about all I can muster up at present. I need to accept that I can’t have everything right now.

That this is a journey…
Oooft I need a shake. Haven’t been able to read or craft this week. Did manage to watch magic mike and fall hopelessly in love with channing Tatum again so it can’t be all bad right?

Clearly that was my up moments.

For the record- I hate rollercoasters…. life’s….all sorts in every sense 😣

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